


And when you think of me, am I the best you've ever had?

by FanTitan



Series: Smiling through the pain [4]
Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, First Dates, Love Confessions, M/M, Title is a panic at the disco line, connor's pov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-12 09:37:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11734365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanTitan/pseuds/FanTitan
Summary: Part 4 in the smiling through the pain seriesConnor was, for the first time, happy.aka Connor's view in this story





	And when you think of me, am I the best you've ever had?

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE READ THE OTHER PARTS OF THIS SERIES BEFORE READING THIS ONE  
> Also this is in Connors point of view.
> 
> I do not own the Dear Evan Hansen characters they belong to their creators.

 

"Mr. Murphy!"

Connor directed his gaze to the teacher standing in front of the classroom. 

"Would you like to explain to me why you are drawing in my class?" Connor realized that a lot of people were staring at him now, including Evan. Evan looked at him with a concerned expression. "I am sorry sir. It won't happen again." Connor said shutting his sketchbook. "It better not." the teacher huffed in annoyance. 

After class Evan walked up to Connor. They had been friends for about a year now. "H-Hey C-Connor." Evan stuttered out nervously.  _He's so cute_.  Connor thought. Connor had, had a crush on Evan for a while now and couldn't help himself. "Hansen. "he said nodding and smiling slightly. They walked side by side but were soon joined by Jared. "Hey! Wait for me you jerk." Jared said rushing after them. Connor snickered. "You  _ditched_ me." Jared accused when he caught up with them.  

 

They ignored Jared's comment and continued walking to the cafeteria. "So Murphy, what were you drawing back there in class?" Jared asked as they entered the lunch room. "Nothing really. Just doodling." Connor lied. No way was he going to tell Kleinman that he was drawing Evan. "If you say so." Jared said totally not believing Connor. Jared suddenly snatched Connor's sketchbook from his hands. "Jared!" Connor said angrily trying to snatch his sketchbook back. "Oh my _god._ " Jared laughed as he stared at one of Connor's drawings. Jared was looking at one of Connors many drawings of Evan.

Evan looked over Jared shoulder and blushed. "Connor...this is really good. I-Is t-this me?" Evan asked, eyes wide. Connor glared at Jared and took his sketchbook back. "Yes. It is a picture of you." Jared looked at Connor hard before walking over to the lunch table they all usually ate at. Connor directed his gaze back at Evan who was still blushing hard. "W-w-why would you d-draw a picture of m-me?" He asked Connor while playing with the bottom of his blue polo shirt. Connor took a deep breath.  _It's now or never._

 

"Can we talk somewhere more...private?" Connor asked now feeling a little embarrassed. "Sure."

Connor lead Evan out and into the bathroom. "Evan.." he began. "I really like you..I mean...shit, what am I doing?" Connor asked pushing his hands through his hair nervously. "I-its okay C-Connor. Y-You can tell me anything." Connor took a deep breath.  _How do you explain an emotion like this?_

"Evan Hansen. I like you. Like, like like you. I think you are adorable and smart. Whenever you talk about trees you get this sparkle in your eyes and it is SO cute. Your so smart not that you will ever admit it and you are just so strong. You have been through so much and is still able to wake up in the morning. You are a inspiration. You inspire me..I guess thats why I drew you so much. You were the first person in my life that gave me a chance. A chance to be better. You have helped me grow into this person that I am today. And I could not be more grateful. So...will you go out with me?" 

 

Evan's face broke into a smile"I-I would love to. I thought you would never ask."

\--------

After school he and Evan walked together to the bowling ally. It was fun. Connor never got more then three pins knocked down while Evan knocked them all down each time. It had been a date full of laughter and light teasing. Connor had fun. 

He drove Evan home at around 6. "Well, I guess that this is it. I had fun." Connor said as he walked Evan to the door.

"I had fun too." Evan said with a beautiful smile. Connor studied Evans face. He saw the light freckles that dusted his checks and glowed. He noticed Evan's bright eyes, full of happiness. "Would you maybe...want to go on another date next week?" Connor asked. 

"I would love too." 

\---

So, he and Evan went on more dates. And Connor was happy. They keep the amount of people that knew about them on the down low. Each date was longer and full of more affection from both of them.One date ended with him and Evan back at Evan's house.

They talked for a long time about life until one thing lead to another and they were kissing. That was Connors first kiss and it was perfect. Evan was perfect. Everything was perfect.

They were there for each other. He always made sure Evan knew how much he loved him and how much he didn't mind Evan's stuttering or his anxiety. Those were things that made Evan him. 

Zoe was happy for him and covered for him whenever their parents asked questions. Things were turning around for the better.

He loved Evan. And didn't feel as alone as he had once long ago. 

He was happy. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading :)


End file.
